Monday, February 23, 2015

My Job as a Hamburger

I’ve been promising to write about my new school and what I actually do here, so I figured it was time to talk about my position as an English Teaching Assistant. The role of teaching assistant really does vary from school to school, for example they expected something entirely different from me at my first school (G2, where, as I have mentioned before, the students were at a very low level of English) than they do at my current school (H18, where the students are at a much higher English level).

(typical questions that I get asked)


At G2 I started out observing classes, from English classes with two different teachers, to classes where they were discussing current events (such as the train strikes in Hamburg) in German, to classes of international students learning both English and German.

Once I started helping out I did everything from giving a presentation on how to use Power Point in English, to making a quiz about global warming and the English vocabulary needed for that subject, to introducing them to the concept of American Thanksgiving via “A Charlie Brown Thanksgiving” and clips from “Friends” (the episode where Joey eats an entire turkey by himself was met with much amusement). I got to have fun and play Scrabble and Rory’s Story Cubes with them, and then sometimes had to do more boring work like creating a template for a maintenance contract. Overall one of the teachers made sure to take advantage of my presence and gave me the opportunity to “team-teach” and help out as much as possible, while my other teacher didn't quite have the same idea, so with her I mostly observed and then occasionally she would throw me into a class or a project with no warning whatsoever.

Comparatively speaking at my new school I have been able to help out a lot more. While I do still observe classes, it is more out of necessity since the students are required to give a lot of presentations. These presentations are still interesting for me though, since they are mostly tourism/travel students giving presentations on either towns and cities in Germany or cities worldwide, and in return I have been giving a presentation about Boston (sorry Pennsylvania people, maybe someday I’ll give a presentation on Lancaster, but for the time being I haven’t been given the time to discuss the whole “Amish” subject).

Aside from that I have mostly been helping with grammar related things, since as I said these students have a much higher level of English, and that is truly what they need help with. I have given a presentation on word order in sentences (subject/place/time, etc. Funny story: my voice gave out halfway through said presentation so a good chunk of it was just me croaking at the class) and a presentation on prepositions (wanted desperately to show them the School House Rock video about prepositions, but decided that if I did so they would probably think that all Americans are on drugs).


I also had to create a handout about when to use the word “the” (kept making puns about “The” Handout…yup, still funny). And I am currently helping some of my tourism students with correcting their homework and business complaint or apology letters (much like what I did as a tutor at Suffolk), checking their grammar, spelling, etc.

There are cons to my job, even at my fancy new school. I definitely feel that I’m not given the chance to help out as much as I would like to. This comes partially from the fact that it seems as though a few of the teachers don’t believe that I can teach/help out because I’m so young/haven’t had a million years of teacher training like German teachers have, and partially from the fact that since I work at a vocational/business school their schedule is often set in stone, and they don’t always have the time to deviate from the plan to do “fun” English things. Most of the time I am just there as an available resource or “living dictionary” if you will. This is a constant source of frustration for me, since there is nothing I dislike more than sitting around doing nothing, which is often what I end up doing in class. As an overachieving workaholic I would love to be active in every single class, but that’s just not how this works and I’ve had to make peace with that.

But aside from that, my new school is definitely one big pro. I love it when I feel like I am actually helping (or getting through) to the students, I love seeing them get excited to see me in class, and I love that I get to learn about a subject that I am interested in as well. My new teachers are all pretty cool, I only have about 14 full weeks of teaching left (!), and also as of Saturday I am on vacation for three weeks and am going to the Netherlands, Belgium, and France, so life is good.

(More typical questions. They really do think that we Americans are all fat, know tons of movie stars, and eat nothing but fast food)



Saturday, February 7, 2015

More weird German crap, aka things about this country that I will probably never understand (and also pictures of a Venetian mask parade)



“Moin” (a greeting which kind of means good morning but also kind of doesn't)

WHAT DOES IT MEAN. Is it “Good morning”? Is it “Good day”? Is it just “Hi”? Why must it be said twice, and often in a high pitched, girlie voice? (not unlike “Tchuss”, or, possibly my least favorite German thing ever, “Tchusseeeeeeeeeeeeee”. Makes me cringe every time)



The education system

I have tried, oh how I have tried to understand how this system works. I’ve heard about it from my German professor back in the States, from school officials here in Hamburg, from teachers at both of my schools, and from other Germans not involved in the education system, but I still do not get it. As far as I can tell it’s just a complicated bureaucratic numerical mess that my tiny American brain will never be able to comprehend.



Everything about this exchange between myself and a bunch of teachers at my school, about my newly blonde hair (keep in mind that this happened multiple times within a two week period)

Them: “Oh you colored your hair!"

Me"..."

Them:"..."

Me: "Yes I did…"

End of conversation.

(So was that supposed to be a compliment or are they just stating the obvious for shits and giggles?)



The hype behind “fritz-kola” (German soda)

I get that it’s a Hamburg thing and all, but to me it just tastes like Coke. Sorry guys.



My German roommate (a guy in his mid-thirties) that I see maybe twice a month, but whom I have determined is my favorite German thus far

Nov 29 – Roommate: "I have...what do you call when you drink too much?" Me: "A hangover?" Roommate: "Yes. I have a hangover. There was a Christmas party at my law firm and there was free alcohol…"

Dec 15 – (when some guy was supposed to come fix our washer, but never showed up) Roommate, via text: Is the washer fixed? Me: Um, he actually never showed up... Roommate: Shit.
(He put a period and everything. He meant business)

Feb 6 - Roommate: "I killed a spider. I am a hero".



And finally, a small collection of “Shit My Students Say” (Fancy New School Edition, including not just funny shit, but also questions about the U.S. that I would not have even thought to ask)

“Why are the Boston Celtics called the Celtics?”

“What does that symbol on the Freedom Trail mean?”

“Why do you say ‘The Netherlands’ in English? Why does it need a ‘the’?!”

“Do Americans use WhatsApp?” (a texting app that is generally used instead of iMessaging here)

Also an entire class doesn't seem to know what to call me, because they can’t remember/pronounce “Alethea”, and while they find “Stoltzfus” to be hilarious (“Proud foot! Proud foot!"), they have settled on “Miss Boston”, which I am kind of okay with.